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Jason Ahn ellipsis

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Playstation + Gameboy = Playboy ...

May 30, 2004 - Sunday

--- Work ---

Its been a while since I've blogged.

So I got a job. I now join the ranks of the employed. ... This'll take time to get used to, but so far so good. ... Although work life is very scary.

So... ... I seem to have run out of creative and witty things to say... ... Not that anything said before this blog was creative or witty. ...

I did laundry today, and I swear ... there's gotta be a trap door inside the washer and dryer that eats up socks. ... It doesn't matter how many times I do laundry, I always end up losing 1 or 2 socks with every load. ... ... Washers and dryers eat socks. It's just a fact of life. ...

Time to pass out.


May 12, 2004 - Wednesday

--- All my "prayas" in the house ---

If a "playa" is one who plays ... ... Then is a "praya" one who ... ... prays? ...


May 8, 2004 - Saturday

"There is a great disturbance in the force"
-- StarWars


May 5, 2004 - Wednesday

--- Life is like a box of chocolates ---

Forrest Gump's momma was a wise woman. ... A few Academy Awards ago, she said: "life is like a box of chocolates" ... ... If that's the case, then this stage of my life is like the little orange-filled, shit-tasting chocolate that no one ever eats.

mmmmmmm ... orange.

They say that there isn't a single word in the English language that rhymes with orange. ... ... But I beg to differ. ... Here are a bunch of words that rhyme with orange:

borange
lorange
forange
menorange
chlorange

See? ... They all rhyme. ... ... Now some of you wise-ass readers might be saying to yourselves: "Jason, you idiot, 'chlorange' isn't really a word!" ... ...

Once again, I beg to differ. ... The Chlorange is actually a very rare form of Orange that can only be grown and harvested in Chlamydia. ... (But Jason! Isn't Chlamydia actually a Sexually Transmitted Disease?) ... ... Well now Chlamydia is a country too! How do you like them apples? ... .... ...

Chloranges taste especially good with peanut butter and dill pickles...

Well now that we're on the subject of fruit ... ... Did you know that there's a Vietnemese fruit called "Jack Fruit" ? ... ... I wonder if the person who discovered it was some guy named "Jack" ... ... So how come there's no "Joe Fruit" ... or "Sally Fruit" ... or "Gertrude Fruit" or something? ... I think there SHOULD be.

Did you know that in some languages there is no word for the word "should" ? ... ... (Its true, go watch the movie "Amistad" to find out) ... ... I guess in those cultures things either get done, or they don't. ... So you either "did" or "did not" ... There's no SHOULD have ... or WOULD have. ... Imagine that? ...

Imagine all the people
Living life in peace
yoo hoo... ...
You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one

John Lennon and the boys did an awful lot of drugs. ... How else could you come up with songs that make references to girls in the sky with diamonds, yellow submarines, gardens owned by octopii and life as a walrus? ...

The average male walrus weighs 760 kg. ...

Last I checked I weighed about 76 kg. ...

One Walrus is ten of me! ...

Sleep? ... Okay. Sounds good.


May 3, 2004 - Monday

--- Yeah so ... ... ... yeah ---

Yeah. ... So. ... Yeah. Its been a while since I've blogged. Tomorrow is supposed to be day 1 of productivity and stuff. (I make this promise to be a better person just about every Monday) ... So I suppose in addition to my "strict" regimen to workout, look for jobs, clean the house, wake up early and help old ladies cross the street ... I will also update my website more regularly. ...

Here's a thought:

Do you think women who use vibrators give birth to children that stutter? ... ... Think about it.

Jason Ahn ellipsis